Feeding Time Conversation

we miss you mommy... get home soon... we love you

Watch til the end it's pretty funny, well at least i think it's pretty funny. I know most people dont think im funny, but some of you (the select chosen ones) will enjoy this.

Nikki Baron's at Work Pick-Me-Up

we love you darling... xo see you at eleven

I need a helping hand

Ok, as many of you know i have been creating a line of books for Destiny enititled "My Life As Your Dad." these books range from pictures of her, me, nikki, articles of importance, stories from the adventures of destiny and whatever i find essential to tell her about. These books are meant to allow a window into my thoughts for my daughter. There is an underlieing reason i want her to have this window and for those of you that know me, know why that is. But i digress, im in somewhat of a need position here, i cannot find one of these books as the two stores in muskogee that used to carry them dont anymore. I have used the "Paperblanks" embellished wraps for these books. If anyone who reads this ever wants to get me a present for my birthday, christmas, halloween... whatever... this is what i want. Bar nothing else, i dont want money (well...), or clothes, a guitar, nothing... i want to create this legacy of memories for Destiny that stretches until she turns eighteen or god forbid something terrible should happen to me. So i ask, quite hat in hand like that if you want to get me a gift, buy me one of these books so that when i finish one i dont have to pause for a few weeks while awaiting the oppurtunity to go to Tulsa to get another. I also would be willing to pay for the book if you were to pick one up for me, they usually cost $15.95, and i would gladly pay for it so that i didnt have to go to Tulsa to get another one. Thank you.


they are Paperblanks embellishes wraps, 144 pages, 7"x 9", memento pouch... they can be found at Amazon.com, Borders, Hastings and Barnes and Noble. Paperblanks also has a 1800 number 1800-277-5887. thank you for reading.

"Terror and Reaction"

It's been six years since
but home looks the same.
She never lost her innocence
but she still feels the shame.
Same clock on the wall
same Harley in the shed.
Nothing has changed at all
even her cozy daybed.
She opens the window
and stares at the ground,
praying for the wind to blow
and take her down.
Thoughts of insecurity
run the widow's mind.
"I can either show my ability
or see you in no time"
she takes two valium
and goes to sleep.
As sleep turns to dream
she lets go into the deep.
She's escaping reality
and her lonely life.
She dreams of casualtys
people dieing left and right.
Awaken by her screams,
drenched in cold sweat.
He is there in her dreams
caught in damien's net.
She can see him at work
on the 53rd floor.
She can see the world go berserk.
The she can't see him anymore
Floating in a sea of hate
It's the same thing she cant escape
She cannot relate,
with this internal rape
She goes to the window again.
The wind she wont need.
Because she will say when,
she has control in deed.
"What if I am insane,
if I die what then?
The clouds will still rain,
The sun will rise again."
You see after he was gone
Her parents took her back in
Afraid of what might go wrong
Praying they could save her, when
They lie asleep together
with nothing they can do.
But pray this storm will weather,
for the next hour or two.
They lie asleep in bed,
Praying for an answer why.
Not aware their daughter lies dead,
Before they could say goodbye.
In her final dreams
she can see him once again.
He's closer than it seems,
sittin there in damiens den.
There magic has been interrupted
now they live eternity in fire.
There perfect world disrupted,
now there world will retire.
For she commited a final sin
and he was already on his way.
Now there together again
together in hell is better than another lonely day.

-John Paul King Baron

i wrote this poem a year ago today, it's an adaption from memory of a poem i wrote a little less than seven years ago that is actually in a time capsule outside of NYC.
God Bless America, God Bless the familys of those lost on this horrific day, god bless our enemies and i pray that they can see the light at the end of the tunnel. God Bless everyone, everywhere. I pray that the wounds this day left can one day heal those in pain. I am thankful i can live and love on this earth today, yet i am saddend when i think of those who cannot. Finally God Bless you, my reader i hope your day is filled with entitlement and beauty.
American,

john paul king baron

new poem

"UNTITLED"

You can live like a liar
And be alone some day
You can play with fire
and the words that you say
I hate a hypocrite
Almost as much as hell
They make me so mad
I just want to yell
Ive been both
A hypocrite and a liar
Ive let my morals
Be sidelined by desire
Ive forgotten what it is
That make me, me
And replaced it with
A twist of reality
You can run on like a thief
Stealing your way through
You can live like a chief
With none of the stress due
You can abuse alcohol
And live to drink
you can watch yourself fall
and forget how to think
ive been both
and alcoholic and a burglar
I let my morals
Be forgotten by vodka nectar
Ive forgotten why I am
The best there is, was and will be
And almost allowed
My desires to kill me
I hate the things I once was
I hate the way I chased a buzz
But I wouldn’t change what I did
Cause I learned my lessons as a kid
And they teach me still
They are the backbone to my will
The examples I need to remind me
And one more way for me to find me

I wrote this poem today, i was trying to justify one of my freinds actions as of late. i wont go into details but it's been very strange and compelling. I am worried about him and the paths and choices he's been making as of late. during these thoughts though i started to think of my past trangressions and realized that there are things i learned as a child that he's probably not learned yet or is just learning.

More NY Vaca pics

honeymoon capital of the world just got a bit hotter... cause ya know the two hottest newlyweds this side of... na noone better looking than us. haha
Devils Hole... sacrifices.
more Niagara Falls delight

ok im just a jackass... look at the sandals... look at my brothers face... classic

pics of freinds and family holding destiny

Grandpa with Desi
Lisa Strom with Desi

(i miss ya lis, it's a shame)

Grandma Steigs with Desi

Uncle Jamie with Desi
Five Generations

great, great grandma baron holding desi

i call her triple g for short now.

Joey-joe with Desi-des, we look so young in this picture.
My godmother Aunt Kathy with Desi
Grandpa Senor with Desi
(Senor thank you again for everything)

Desi's on a plane...

Mommy and Desi on our first flight
Mommy and Desi en route to Buffalo from Chicago
Me and Desi on the Buffalo flight

"Look Dad I'm flying"

ahhhhh Me and Desi-pooh on our flight home. at one point i had Desi sleeping on my chest, Nikki had her head on my shoulder and i was just sitting there with my eyes closed thinking about how lucky i am, to have the two greatest girls in the world depending upon me for there rest and piece of mind.

"It's time to get these Mu**a F***in' Desi's off this Mu**a F***in' plane!" - Samuel L Jackson
ps.... Desi was so good on the plane, she didnt cry once. A little squirming when she got hungry but she was perfect, she handled it better than me and Nikki combined.

me on stage with the Jeremy Hoyle Band (aka Strictly Hip)

early one morning while making the rounds....

because your mine... i walk the line...

that's nikki's ringer, or it was nikki's ringer on my cellphone.

Our First Bills Game

So Me and Desi-pooh watched our first Buffalo Bills game together sunday. I DVR'd the Bills-Redskins game from saturday night, got her all geared up, put on my jersey, turned on the game and subsequently slept through the majority of it. She was out too, i guess it was cute and symbolic all tied together. Well she looks great in her Bills onesie plus it's a little big so she can wear it all season, even for the Super Bowl (wouldnt that be awesome).
Well im sure this wont be the last me, Desi and he Bills post, and believe me you can expect some posts about me, desi and OU as well....Good day

"Murder Lot"

Washing clothes in dirty water. Sinking down a little bit farther. Hiding emotions behind a towel, facial expressions are nothing more than a scowl. Bite your tongue when you speak, we cant afford another leak. Noone knows where we are, if they did we be a star.
Digging a hole six feet down, heavy breathing is the only sound. Wipe the blood with gasoline, making sure I get away clean.
I do the delivery at daybreak, marking the grave with a stake. They wont be missed for another hour, after I dispose of the clothes and take a shower. Mad as hell yet I feel triumphant, cause I was deliberate and reluctant. They had it coming i said, you replied “there better off dead”
Digging a hole six feet down, heavy breathing is the only sound. Wipe the blood with gasoline, making sure I get away clean
There names are all over the news, but I didn’t leave the cops any clues. Im back at work and nothings changed. Noone will know how my life was rearranged. Cause we were precise and proficient, leaving no traces were we went. They’ll search for days on end, false hope is all just pretend.
Digging a hole six feet down, heavy breathing is the only sound. Wipe the blood with gasoline, making sure I get away clean
Blood stained pants burn so quick, but the smoke it produces is pretty thick. So I douse it with gasoline, light a match and get away clean. No fingerprints from my glove, noone figured a freinds love. We left a house torn apart, right after they broke our heart. Sinking down in my chair, “im a sick bastard, I do so declare”
Digging a hole six feet down, heavy breathing is the only sound. Wipe the blood with gasoline, making sure I get away clean
Smile at the reporters looking to score, I tell em “I wish I knew more.” Some believe me but most do not, while their bodys continue to rot. “This aint no storyline son” said the sheriff while cleaning his gun. But he has no evidence to back his claim, and the prosecutor still don’t know my name.
Digging a hole six feet down, heavy breathing is the only sound. Wipe the blood with gasoline, making sure I get away clean
An earth mover has unearthed my friends, but the investigation never ends. Even now as evidence mounts, they still have nothing that counts. Covered my tracks well and ive paved my way to hell. They had it coming for sure, and with their death came my cure.
Digging a hole six feet down, heavy breathing is the only sound. Wipe the blood with gasoline, making sure I get away clean.

----------------------------------

this one i wrote about a dream i had last night. i dreamt that these three football players from a local college had killed and raped a family freind and then me and one of my family members went and merked all three of them and buried them outside of town. There was a media circus and many people thought i had done it, but we were so careful in our planning that the police never found enough evidence to even get a search warrant for my house neverless a conviction. i know i have sick, sick dreams but im glad their just my dreams.

baby crying

"you guys havent fed me in twenty minutes!!!"- Destiny

" ahhhh, it's so terrible" - daddy

Click the Link

http://www.nfljuice.com/2008/07/24/non-nfl-sesame-street-gets-dirty/

i guess i wont be allowing Destiny to watch Sesame St. anytime soon... i think Elmo started this one off perfectly. Well it has been an absolutely horrible day and i dont see it getting any better, so i needed a smile. This did just that. so click the link and smile with me

"the dude to the dad"

sitting down for another day, wipe the sleep from my eyes. imagining another way, to be aware of new suprises. you see im only a man and i dont always know how to be all that i can and which way i should go.

im at the corner, where the sign said. it's time for the dude, to become the dad.

there's no traffic light, no vehicles in my mirror. There's noone else in sight, just seeing myself clearer. you see im just a man and there's no way to know, how to be all that i can or which way i should go.

im at the corner where the sign said. It's time for the dude, to become the dad.

i spent so much time just being the dude. spending my time getting drunk and being rude. i wasnt sure if i could get past the times i had and learn to grow up. so i could be a dad. but those questions dont faze me, i wont let them no longer. i now can finally praise me, cause my will's grown stronger. you see im just a man, and i dont always know, how to be all that i can and which way i should go. but im...

im at the corner where the sign said, it's time for the dude, to become the dad.

My lil girl

Im so proud of my lil girl...

baby desi

more pics

Mommy right after the C-section. She didnt really recall kissing Destiny. But luckily Daddy snuck a camera into the delivery room and got a picture for her.

Mommy in our room at the hospital

Me and Des having fun with Grandpa's awesome camera gift. Thank you grandpa Danny Joe we love it, and hey now you can see Baby Des whenever you want, eh?

i love looking into My Baby's Eyes

More Pictures of Little Destiny

Destiny With her Daddy

Destiny with Aunt Johnna

Destiny with Grandma Vicki

aint she soo adorable...

our family

Shes so perfect, so wonderful...

I am so humbled by her already. The whole experience was so wonderful, Nikki was such a trooper she was in labor for nineteen hours. Then she had to have a Csection so recovery will be tougher. I am so proud of her, she was so strong and handled everything so well. Thank you to all that came out or called i appreciate your love and support so much.

- John Paul Baron

ps. Destiny is perfect check out these pics...