tied up and gagged, like Mortimer in the arsenic and the old lace. wieghed down and bagged, like sailors sinking to the bottom of davey jones's place. death and murder, the easy ways out. death and murder, reasons to scream and shout. a lil bit of wine, the guards are playing taps. the chill of my spine, the sound of people playing craps. confused look as shes falls down,
parachute didnt work and she cant here a sound.
the question im posing is do u go to heaven. when u've done everything that u can. been a a god loving, god fearing human being. but what if u sin right before your life is fleeting. it's a question that has no mortal answer. i wish that they could come back from there deaths cancer. to ease the questions in my mind. and to take this pain from my hearts bind.
death and deceit follow a life of a fool. these are not things that u learn in school. my mother died without knowing she was done. and in her final moments im sure she prayed for her daughter and son. not for herself and her mortal sin. and that is where my problem did begin. i begged and pleaded with god for the truth. but ive lived with doubt cause i have no proof. did she make it to the gates made of pearl. or was it the flames of hades that her soul now must hail.
i refuse to believe that all people must ask forgiveness. we wouldnt have been made human with desire to be witness. but i read the bible and i cant decipher it's words. and my mind has gone away and flying with the birds. sadness and cruelity are all thats left to say. even though i once thought life was fun and gay. but now i wonder with death and murder.
the question im posing is do u go to heaven. when u've done everything that u can. been a a god loving, god fearing human being. but what if u sin right before your life is fleeting. it's a question that has no mortal answer. i wish that they could come back from there deaths cancer. to ease the questions in my mind. and to take this pain from my hearts bind.
death and deceit follow a life of a fool. these are not things that u learn in school. my mother died without knowing she was done. and in her final moments im sure she prayed for her daughter and son. not for herself and her mortal sin. and that is where my problem did begin. i begged and pleaded with god for the truth. but ive lived with doubt cause i have no proof. did she make it to the gates made of pearl. or was it the flames of hades that her soul now must hail.
i refuse to believe that all people must ask forgiveness. we wouldnt have been made human with desire to be witness. but i read the bible and i cant decipher it's words. and my mind has gone away and flying with the birds. sadness and cruelity are all thats left to say. even though i once thought life was fun and gay. but now i wonder with death and murder.
why would god want take life without even a shudder.
sitting on the ledge, waiting to jump to the ground below. put your teeth on the curb, as he tucks his pride in tow. one bullet in the chamber, as the barrell begins to spin. russian roullette for now, one click and his life will begin again. death and murder, cloud my mind right now. death and murder, i dont know why and i dont know how. death and murder, brings tears to my broken heart. death and murder, always the actor we all play are part.
dedicated to my mother Mary Louise King-Baron
March 3rd, 1960 - August 11th, 1985
i will always miss and love you. i pray that you are looking down upon me in tow with grandpa king, grandpa baron, uncle al, Lyndsay Magiver, Cray King and many others whose lives were taken to early and whose life has touched mine so deeply. again i dont know where your soul rest but i promise that someday no matter where you are, i will be there too. i love you.
also dedicated to my Grandmother W. Louise King, she is still with us here on earth and for that i am most thankful cause without her i wouldnt know my mother. I wouldnt have any idea of who she was or what she was about. I pray that through my journals and this blog my daughter will never have to wonder if something should happen to me. Thank you Grandma, i love you.
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