"Oh I Silenced My Ears"

Oh I silenced my ears, yet I hear the ring.
I coughed through my vocal cords but I still sing.
Gave away the cappuccino, stole the window cling
Thought about a revival but I remembered what that’ll bring

Oh I silenced my heart but it skipped a beat
Now im panting and fallen from my seat.
Im not the same man, those memories you’ll have to delete
Ive grown up twenty years, cause I have a daughter to meet.

Oh I silenced my nerves, yet my hands still quake
I forgot the feeling but lost the my own stake.
Gave away a Picasso, own I knew they would take
So that I could stand before you, and not have to shake.

Oh I silenced the critics yet I still hear naysayers
I laughed while I prayed, but god still heard my prayers
I never gave a damn so I guess I now have cares.
The world gave me a spot now I have to be one of the players.

Oh I silenced my own mind, yet I hear rocks fall.
i pushed the car in neutral, but now it wont stall
gave away my desperation, and answered Nikki’s call
once I wanted everything, now I want to give it all.

Oh I silenced my silence but I speak so much less.
I frowned through a smile, now I grin through progress

Im not the same man, no more fighting through another mess
Ive become a man, happy and excited I confess.

I wrote this poem a few months ago, and it concentrates on the thoughts i used to have about never having a family and my ineptness in establishing roots in soceity and how the news of my wife's pregnancy had silenced those concerns. My life had found meaning and therefore "silenced my ears", so to speak. i guess it's similar to the psychotic battle of differing emotions that quietly coexist now that i know what i have to do, better yet now that i get to do what i want to do.

i hope you enjoy it. good day.